This can be difficult to answer. The word comes from the Latin to mean 'to put one's trust in someone' - that someone being ourselves.
The confidence checklist
How then is confidence - real confidence - demonstrated? Here's the iVillage 10-point checklist:
1. People who believe in themselves take charge of their actions.
2. They act assertively, speak calmly and listen properly.
3. They're flexible towards people, circumstances and all things new.
4. They're able to give genuine praise and to accept constructive criticism.
5. They evaluate themselves realistically.
6. They appreciate their achievements.
7. They learn from their mistakes.
8. They aren't run by 'shoulds', 'musts' and 'ought tos'.
9. When an opportunity comes up they say 'Why not?' rather than 'Why?'
10. They feel they can influence situations and outcomes.
The confidence withinWhere exactly does all this come from? Are we born with it? Are we socialised into it? "Yes, and yes," says psychologist Gary Fitzgibbons.
"Confidence is within all of us, but whether it shines through or whether it remains hidden can depend on how we are treated as children and young adults.
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